Tuesday, May 31, 2011

I don't belong here

I think I'm starting to understand a little bit better, this feeling I have.

This feeling of not belonging.

I am becoming more and more aware of the fact that I, as a foreigner, do not belong in Korea.

The people are of a different culture, language, understanding, mentality, upbringing.

Everything is different.

And no matter if I learn the language, the customs, the names of place, have Korean friends, I will never belong here. I was not born here and therefore I will never share that bond with the people who were born here.

Same thing goes for Canada.

I went there when I was 12. I left when I was 24.

I spent 12 years in Canada and I don't feel Canadian at all. Except for the fact that I got used to having the privileges that come with being Canadian and living there, and I don't think I would find it easy settling anywhere else.

Now, when I think of Romania... that's something different.

I can't wait to go back there this August.

I won't be a stranger there. I'll know the language, I'll know the customs, I'll know the people.

They'll also know me, and be able to understand me.

I was born there, they were born there, I grew up there, they grew up there.

That country and people are still in my heart and I long to be somewhere where I'm not a stranger.



2 comments:

Anonymous said...

you are so strong and brave and i admire your resolve...you have so much endurance and adventure in your heart...

woogawooga said...

I somehow ended up at your blog, and particularly this article. I am sorry that you felt being different in Korea.
I haven't checked out your recent postings but I believe that you are doing good wherever you are and whoever you are.

Everybody has his or her comfortable culture and society. What do you think the person feels uncomfortable or difficulties in their own society or culture? feeling uncomfortable at the very place where he or she was born?

This is my problem...

Well...just wanted to leave any comment at your article. Hope everything is going well with you!